Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
