Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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