So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
