tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
