He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
