Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
