It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize
