My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
