so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I want to stick my p in your. b.
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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