I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Randomize
