i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
