How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
