all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
