Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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