Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Randomize
