I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
It's no shave November. This is our time.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
