wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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