come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Randomize
