Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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