I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
