I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
You dont lie about slip and slides
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
