Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Randomize
