Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
