So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
