We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
