I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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