It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
