How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Two words: blizzard sex
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
