Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
