I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I want to stick my p in your. b.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
