I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
