I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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