yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
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