I got chris browned last night
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
