I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
My cat gives me a boner
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize
