I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
