You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
