Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
