if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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