I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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