ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
it glows. i had to have it.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
