this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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