i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
