What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Randomize
