I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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