im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
