It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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