he thought i was a dude.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
