I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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