we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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